Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (Episode IX)

Discussion in 'Movie, TV, & Video Games' started by Spoon, Apr 12, 2019.

  1. Bran

    Bran The wolf dead.

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    And if there’s another role more tailor made for Luke and Owen Wilson, I haven’t seen it.
     
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  2. Ninjastix

    Ninjastix The Fat Mamba Site Donor

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    To me..

    How it should have happened.. (open)
    Post episode 8 you have Rey fall to the darkside. How? Why? Palpatine's ghost. She did NOT have to be directly related to Palpatine. It'd of been enough if a former apprentice of Palpatine's turned from the Emperor when he or she found the majesty of the sexing. Don't need to introduce the parents. Don't need to know who they were in totality.

    Palpatine's essence, like the Jedi, remains among the force sensitive and yes, he has been the voice in Kylo's head and through Kylo's connection to Rey, he discovered MOAR POWAH!!! He manipulates Rey through the link she shares with Kylo, slowly feeding her fear and uncertainty through false visions. She ungoes a fetch quest that turns out to be a trap whereby she gives into all of her doubts and fears leading to her possession. Kylo senses this and as he does - their link is immediately severed.

    Possession of Rey would have been preferable to the Warhammer 40k interpretation of the Emperor imho.

    Now! This is where Kylo's redemption arc comes in. Realizing he's been a pawn of the Emperor and that all his plans were in service of a greater evil, he then has a crisis of conscience over Rey's turn, who as it turns out, has no interest in ruling along side Kylo. Instead she usurps his command and takes the Knights of Ren and the armies of the First Order for her own. Kylo, at his lowest point, encounters the force ghost of Luke who reconciles with his former apprentice and urges him to seek out his sister, which Kylo does ultimately overcoming his fear and guilt - shares a moment with his Dad as well.

    When Kylo reaches Leia she's on her death bed. They reconcile just before her death and Kylo is determine to turn Rey from the Dark side same as Luke did with his father. Rey and Kylo have a lightsaber and force duel to end all duels. He succeeds in the course of action by re-establishing the link between he and Rey. During the action the power from Palpatine's spirit is too much for Rey's body to contain (there's a lot of raw emotion from the two as expressed in both fight choreography and something called "dialog") and so Rey/Emperor taps into Kylo's body as well where Kylo traps the spirit of the Emperor. He then harikari's himself killing two birds with 1 lightsaber. In his dying moments he apologies to Rey and tells her to restart the Jedi Order in obscurity (having been a Dark Emperor, she will not be accepted by others and people are tired of force users ruining their governments). Rey becomes a Jedi Master in exile (fucking character arc homie).

    The First Order, with no leadership, no fear left to instill through Sith, crumble under the weight of rebellion from system after system. No super weapons needed. Just endurance. The Rebels simply outlast the Imperial war machine which collapses onto itself. Only Rey knows of Kylo's sacrifice and takes up pseudo anonymity on a barren world under the Skywalker mantle. We see her discovering a long deserted Jedi temple on desert planet with one, ONE setting sun.

    No force healing
    No force resurrection
    No planetary force lightning
    No DragonBall Z spirit bomb life-force donation
    And most of all..

    NO fucking forced kiss.



    Where's my money?

    (Edit) Also, also.. they sort of straight up stole the plot of A Bug's Life. I didn't see this noted anywhere else but as they kept emphasizing the whole "more of us than them" thing, it became more and more apparent they were setting up the ant revolt.
     
    Last edited: Dec 23, 2019
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  3. Miz

    Miz mortality, ka, and the Tower

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    Me and the boy saw it today. Enjoyable but not great. I got a bit bored. I think I find Kylo Ren boring.
     
  4. Dimson

    Dimson Your tears don't fall...

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    Kylo is so emo. It gets on my nerves. Lol.
     
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  5. disposableassassin

    disposableassassin Mutatis Mutandis Site Donor

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  6. Nebraska

    Nebraska Poindexter For President NFL S.P. Champion Site Donor

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    Given how Jake Lloyd’s life has turned out thus far I’m not sure we can lay that one on Star Wars fans.
     
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  7. Ninjastix

    Ninjastix The Fat Mamba Site Donor

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    I'm not putting this in spoiler tags because I don't consider it a spoiler, it's shown (briefly) in the trailer.

    Was Palpatine's fleet built or was it literally conjured by evil force powers? I don't care about the logistics of a couple hundred thousand people living on ships buried underground. I'm assuming that was done to hide the activity? Even though the planet/moon was inaccessible? But whatever.

    Did he comission the ships with loyal or furloughed workers or did this fucking prune just use the force to manifest fully functioning, fully staffed star destroyers?
     
  8. Nebraska

    Nebraska Poindexter For President NFL S.P. Champion Site Donor

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    Palpatine’s minions built the ships, Kylo’s staffed them.
     
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  9. Palma

    Palma I am chaos

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    This reminds me of Clerks and the innocent contractors that died on the death star
     
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  10. Ninjastix

    Ninjastix The Fat Mamba Site Donor

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    I kinda think they weren't built. I think he literally made them with force powers. I don't think this movie gave a shit about the divide between mechanical and fantastical.

    But that's no longer the most confusing bit. I'm more confused by Palpatine commanding Kylo to kill Rey because he needs her alive.
     
  11. disposableassassin

    disposableassassin Mutatis Mutandis Site Donor

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    You think palpatine knew that rey would kick kylos ass and that maybe his whole intent was to push rey into killing kylo ren?
     
  12. Ninjastix

    Ninjastix The Fat Mamba Site Donor

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    Sure, but then why didn't he know that Kylo would betray him for Rey? Or that Rey wouldn't join him. Why not just possess his son or his daughter rather than his grand daughter? Or if he had the power to suck force, why didn't he just drain Rey and Kylo completely? If he's immortal why does he need his grand daughter's body? Can't he just use a body? Like all the Snokes he made?

    Why didn't he stop shooting lightning? Why are two lightsabers so much better at reversing global force lightning than one? What killed Rey if she took no damage?

    Why do each of the third films in each of the trilogies have Palpatine being the victim of his own lightning?

    I think the answer to all is probably: BAD WRITING
     
  13. disposableassassin

    disposableassassin Mutatis Mutandis Site Donor

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    For sure. Star wars movies fall apart the second you start analyzing ANYTHING. Like lucas claimed he had all three of the origional trilogy planned out completely but either he lied or he is really into incest.
     
  14. Ninjastix

    Ninjastix The Fat Mamba Site Donor

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    I don't think that's accurate, plenty holds up in the original because "space magic" isn't the focus. It's on the periphery, it's a convenient plot device to help explain coincidence and circumstance. It never should have been a main focus and there are now 6 movies that illustrate this.

    Not because it's not possible either, but because modern movies have to have 30 subplots running at all times. For example, what's the one story the new trilogy tells? I have no idea either. Same is true for the prequels. It's not the rise and fall of Anakin either because we never see the rise. The fall is shoe horned in the last film with no prior set up. So the prequels are about what exactly?

    They're about the same shit the new films are about. The minutiae. All the stuff that in and of itself DOESNT MATTER if you do not have characters to care about.

    And since Palp wasn't in 7 or 8. And since they never established what force powers can and can't do. And since all the characters were undercut by reworking due to audience responses.

    You're left with "kill the girl; I need her alive" and "don't be afraid to be who you are; I'm Rey Skywalker".
     
  15. disposableassassin

    disposableassassin Mutatis Mutandis Site Donor

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    I died inside when she said skywalker...like wtf

    I still do not think George had decided on luke and leia being brother and sister until later.

    Totally agree on the rest of that though.
     
  16. Ninjastix

    Ninjastix The Fat Mamba Site Donor

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    Lucas never had a complete trilogy. The first movie was an accidental mega success and when he left the second film expecting it to bomb it only improved the formula but drawing out all the emotional weight the first had established.

    He had to come back to three to swing his director penis and we got Ewoks and Han fucking with a door for 60 minutes.

    I think there's enough evidence to say Lucas may be a technical genius when it comes to effects and sound, but in terms of directing, or dear god writing? No, he had collaborative success and when those collaborations ended we got the prequels.

    So I am no Lucas apologist. The new trilogy is just the other end of the spectrum. Over collaboration.

    Star Wars is the simplist fucking story about a boy rescuing a princess. But an algorithm or a George Lucas can't seem to grasp the sweet simplicity of it. Other than using it to print money.
     
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  17. Spoon

    Spoon There is no Spoon Survival Pool Champion

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    Rey being Palpatine's granddaughter bugs me too much, it ruined the whole movie for me. From the flashbacks, Rey's parents were fairly young. But Ben is Vader's grandson, and roughly the same age as Rey. When Palpatine turned Anakin, he was old enough to be Anakin's father, maybe even grandfather. What kind of skank would have slept with 100+ year old shriveled up Palpatine? IMO, it would have made far more sense if he had a kid before Mace fucked him all up, and that Rey was his great granddaughter.

    Then the whole force healing thing Rey does... get the fuck out of here. Let me guess, she learned it from one of those ancient Jedi books. Mysteriously a power like that was found in an old book, but never used when the Jedi were more prevalent? Oh, and Ben can fucking do it too after seeing it done to him one frigging time. Nope, not buying it for a second.
     
  18. Nebraska

    Nebraska Poindexter For President NFL S.P. Champion Site Donor

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    Obi Wan forced-healed Luke in A New Hope. Baby Yoda did it too in The Mandalorian. We don’t know how Rey and Ben learned it since Disney hasn’t explained it, so it’s possible that all force users learn it eventually.
     
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  19. Ct_L33T

    Ct_L33T Well-Known Member

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    This movie was like dry socks on freshly mopped kitchen floor. My consistent gripe about this series is that the lightsaber battles looked very uninspired/unchoreographed, but I really never had a 'wow that's cool' moment from the fight scenes or force powers.

    Perhaps my biggest gripe with the movie is that they went out of their way to make the Jedi seem not 'special'; I left the original 6 movies wanting to be a sith Lord, this trilogy left me wanting to be a Mandelorian.

    That in of itself wouldn't be so annoying if the final scene didn't have Rey call herself a Skywalker. All that talk about names and lineage not determining who you are, bla bla bla, just for Rey to make that statement, throwing away the Palpatine name. It seemed very 'Disney' to me.

    This trilogy was unsatisfying. Not terrible, but by far my least favorite trilogy.
     
    Last edited: Jan 9, 2020
  20. Ninjastix

    Ninjastix The Fat Mamba Site Donor

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    I will say that while I don't like the Mandelorian because of how average and generic it is to me, it does feel much more like the original movies than the prequels or sequel trilogy.

    You can do any force powers you want. You can bring back any characters you want. You can introduce a fleet of death stars in my book. But you have to set things up. And it was near 9 hours of things happening to happen vs. having a reason for happening.

    Even if the characters weren't the strongest, you had the chance to really do something interesting with the lore and they failed to do anything other than a stunt show. Which is fine because people paid to see it. Just like people pay to see Monster Trucks. Let's just not pretend there's an interesting story to any of it.

    I was entertained by episode 9 for the ridiculous spectacle it was but I felt nothing and I'll never watch it again. It's the same way I felt about Infinity War and End Game though those established their characters and events much more competently. They earned the Royal Rumble of a finale.

    But I still don't care about worlds where death is only a mild inconvenience.
     

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